Although many vanillas do not understand this concept, anyone in the lifestyle will tell you that swinging is not cheating. While swinging fits under the category of extra-martial sex, it cannot be considered cheating because the extra-martial sex is consensual. By definition, true cheating involves deception. Just like Trina Decker explained, "when it comes to the lifestyle, everything is "on the table."
However, we have heard of lifestyle couples who say that they resorted to swinging in order to keep themselves from cheating, and we are torn as to whether this a healthy situation. We suppose there is no problem with this if both parties sincerely believe that their souls are not intended to be monogamous, but it's best to realize this prior to getting married.
On the other hand, we also know of some people who are genuinely aroused by the clandestine nature of cheating. For example, one blogger appropriately known as Ms. Inconspicuous enjoys writing about the erotic qualities of infidelity. For people such as her, the lifestyle would probably not curb her behavior. Honest swinging might be fun for her, but it wouldn't provide quite the same naughty thrill as meeting men on the down low.
A better example would be Michelle Ormond, a Denver-area lady also known as the "Pass-Around Girl." Back in the early 2000's, she was involved in a live-in triad with her legal husband Dennis and well-known porn star Bisexual Britni, and we met the three of them at several swing parties around town. Even though Dennis did not have an issue with Michelle fucking other men, even without him being present, Michelle could not resist the urge to carry on numerous affairs and lie about it in order to keep them secret. She was eventually diagnosed with sexual addiction.
Frankly, we believe that people who have healthy, satisfying relationships prior to entering the lifestyle ultimately make the best swingers.
